CIM Training Journal #3: Why do these goal paces keep making me laugh?

This continues CIM Training Journals #1 and #2.

August 28, 2017
My running confidence is a pretty fickle thing.  Some days I think I am going to be ready to try 26.2 at 6:17 pace in December, and other days I don't think I can even run a 5K at 6:17 pace!  It is heavily influenced by my surroundings and recent events, which of course I know as a behavior analyst (environment determines behavior, and confidence is really just verbal behavior).  I am not exactly sure how I can be less dramatic about it though.  Right now it's good workout = "I am ready to take on the world" and bad workout = "I'm never going to run anything good again".

My coach advises me to focus on the week I'm in and on getting in the day-to-day training.  It's all targeted at getting me to my goal, and success is the sum of small efforts repeated day after day.  I love the every day process, and sometimes I get lost in enjoying it (and stop thinking about the end goals), which is the best!

I think some of my worry stems from setting a very big and very public goal.  Before the BMO Mesa-Phoenix Marathon, I was quite open that I was chasing a PR, but that wasn't a super challenging goal given how my fall 2016 marathons both has snafus that prevented me from performing my best, that I'd raced two break-through half marathons, and that the Phoenix course was faster than those I ran in 2016. I didn't share my big scary secret goal of 2:49 until after the race. Perhaps I should have taken that approach with CIM -- but I was just so excited I couldn't hide it and now I've told the world!  Live and learn, right?!

August 30, 2017
15 base pace miles before work this morning!  Beforehand I figured if I ran it in about 1:45, I could even be on time to work (it was a day I had a little flexibility and could roll in at 8:30 instead of 8:00 if I needed to) -- and I finished it off in 1:44:15, or 6:57 average pace.  Now I *just* need to run 1 hours longer 40 seconds/mile faster, bahaha!  I am feeling good about my long runs right now though...my speed, not so much!

August 31, 2017
I don't know why God has blessed me with running, but I am so thankful for it every day.  I recently saw the quote, "Happiness is based on happenings, but joy is based on Jesus."  I am guilty of letting disappointing performances put a damper on my mood, but at the end of the day I've got the joy of Jesus in my heart no matter what!  May I run and do everything else like a soul on fire!

September 7, 2017
I'd call this an un-confident week.  I'm tired from the weekend, swamped at work, and keep thinking that if 6:10 pace was all I had in the Run for a Child 10K, then working towards 6:17 pace for 20 miles farther in 12 weeks is impossible.  My coach told me that no one runs well when the dew point is in the 70s, and that my training wasn't targeted at a fast time in that race (it was supposed to be more of a tempo than a race, but the high end of my tempo range is 6:10 so it was barely that!).  I think I am really caught up in thinking that I have to hit a certain time for a 10K in order to hit a certain time for a half in order to hit a 2:45:00 for a full.  But obviously there are additional factors at play, including tapering or lack of tapering, peaking, weather, competition, course, etc. (I later mentioned the amazing effects of these things here).  I am just feeling discouraged and worn out this week!

September 11, 2017
Running the Plaza 10K was a really good call.  I didn't feel like I could mentally handle another race that felt like the Run for a Child 10K, and with the temperatures forecasted for Plaza I almost wondered if it would do me more harm than good to run it.  But I am so glad I gave it a go!  I was able to average 5:59 pace with temperatures in the 70s/85% humidity on a somewhat rolling course (170 ft of gain).  I like to think I could do 5:55 pace with ideal conditions, and this race made me more confident that I really could, or a tad faster if I tapered.  I also feel better about my half marathon goal on September 30; I will need ideal weather conditions to hit it, but with a taper I think it's reasonable to give it a go!  Now let's see if my 2 x 4 mile tempo workout tomorrow confirms that... (Follow-up:  the 2 x 4 mile tempo workout went well considering I was feeling the Plaza race/long run combo on my legs.  I averaged 6:02 for the first 4 mile tempo and 6:06 for the second, and all of my miles were within my goal range of 6:00-6:10, although I had to really fight for it in the final 2 mile, and clearly would have preferred a negative split!).

September 14, 2017
This morning after mentioning to one of my training partners that CIM is 11 weeks away, I started thinking about "life after marathon" and Plan B.  Right now, Plan A is to try for the OTQ B standard at CIM, but if I get to CIM and it's 75*, I won't try -- which would be disappointing, but I'm not that big of an idiot.  If I have nice weather and try, I could very well fail.  I didn't break 3:00 the first time I tried either, and if I were into setting easily achievable goals this would not have been one I selected.

No doubt that I will try again if I don't achieve my goal, but should I try another one off of the same training cycle?  I've had success running two marathons off of one training cycle before (Bass Pro + Dallas in 2015, Prairie Fire + Bass Pro in 2016, and even back with I was training myself pretty cluelessly with Heart of America + Bass Pro 2010).  With my Mesa-Phoenix training cycle I only ran one, but I was able to hold near my peak long enough to also run PRs in the half and 10K (plus a solid 12K and a second solid half), so I don't think it's out of the realm of possibility to give it a try.  I just hadn't thought about it until now because I've been so focused on CIM being IT, and on choosing no future races until after it.  I'm not sure if it's a good or bad approach to have a Plan B already, but since I'm a planner...

I looked up the Chevron Houston Marathon, because I knew it was in January, notoriously fast, and a USATF sanctioned event where several people net OTQ times.  I qualify for their Athlete Development Program (ADP), so I could get some perks, including a free entry.  It's 6 weeks after CIM, so close enough that I could probably hold peak or close, but far enough that I would have enough time to fully recover.  I like knowing it's there as an option, so I'm heavily considering submitting my application for the ADP, but I should probably discuss it with my husband and coach first...

Either way, there will be life after marathon, which is almost unbelievable! 

September 17, 2017
I had a really good long run today that made me think that maybe, just maybe, 6:17 pace for 26.2 at peak on a fast course in ideal weather with a group to run with is something I can do.  I feel like I really need a big half PR before I try it, though.

September 18, 2017
Well, I made this today...  There's a lot of 6:15s on there (insert freak out face here)!

September 22, 2017
I told Jon I wanted to take it easy over the weekend, "because I have to try to run 13.1 miles at 6:06 pace next weekend", and we both laughed at how crazy it is to run that pace for a half, and the irony that it is not a completely unrealistic goal.  Seeing it on paper terrifies me!  I am glad I will have another go at it in November.  Right now I feel ready to go for a PR (under 1:21:26), but not a 1:19 -- which is the same way I feel about my marathon (ready for a PR but not a 2:45).  I also made this, although I don't think I'm going to use it this time.

I've been thinking about how God puts dreams in our hearts for a reason, and this concept is going to be a complete blog in itself, but I hope I am using things that happen along the way to serve Him and to serve others.  Building each other up is what it's all about, and I've been so blessed to have so many amazing people come into my life through running.  I hope I help them as much as they help me.  I try to be encouraging of others, in running and in non-running life.  Sometimes running feels like a selfish pursuit (especially in regards to pursuing big goals like these), but I pray I am using it as I am supposed to!

September 23, 2017
I'm wrapping up this training journal following my first 20 miler of this training cycle!  It felt great at a 6:49 average pace, and in general my long runs have made me feel good about my goal because I'm averaging over 20 sec/mile faster than I was running them at before BMO Mesa-Phoenix.  With my marathon goal pace being 10 sec/mile faster than I ran at Phoenix, it appears the math is in my favor.  After my run today, I thought, "Now I *just* have to run 10K farther at 32 sec/mile faster"...and I then laughed out loud.

Plaza 10K: That's more like it!

The short:
When I put this race on my schedule, my goal was to hit 36:59, but as go-time neared and the forecast refused to cooperate, I revised my time goal to 37:30ish.  I believe I'm in shape to break 37:00, but I'm going to need 45* to do it; a temperature in the 70s with high humidity isn't going to cut it!  I finished in exactly 37:30.  This is a new road PR for me, and while it is not as fast as my track PR of 37:09, I believe it was a stronger performance due to the weather (it was in the 40s for my track PR), the course (this one had 170 ft of elevation gain), and running this during a 64 mile week (also it was kind of my third race in 8 days).  The field was deep, and I was 8th overall female and 1st in the 35-39 age group.  I ran smart and strategically with my competition, and could really only be happier with this one if I could have found 5 seconds more in the last mile and/or it had actually been 45*!  It was a huge relief after not feeling like my fitness showed at the Run for a Child 10K on Labor Day, and I am now ready to tackle my half marathon goal (which I get a taper for!) on September 30, weather permitting.

Clock shots are my husband's specialty

The long:
I was oh-so-hopeful for cool weather for this one, because we saw morning lows of 45-50* during the week preceding the race, but Mother Nature wasn't ready to hand me those conditions yet.  I contemplated pulling out of the race because I wasn't pre-registered, I was coming off of a fatiguing week at work (hello, 10-11 hour days!), and the main reason I put this one on my schedule was for a PR attempt, which would not be happening in the 70s (my Labor Day race had sure reminded me of that!).  I decided it would still be good for me to run it in order to race in a competitive field, and with the pressure of a PR attempt lifted I got pretty excited to just get out there and compete!

Race morning I did all of my usual routines and lined up at the starting line ready to roll.  There were a lot of very fast women on the starting line; some who I knew, others I knew of, and a few who just looked super speedy.  I knew pretty quickly that I wouldn't place in the money (top 4), but I also welcomed the competition because I always run best in races I do not win.

10Ks make Albani yawn

I got off the starting line behind a large group of Kansas City Smoke girls.  I knew there were several in the group who would likely be right around my pace (deja vu of the Big 12 12K).  In the first bit I was behind them all, but I felt like I was pacing well, so I looked down at my watch for confirmation and it read a big fat 0:00.  I'd pressed start at the gun, but clearly I hadn't gotten it started, and I hadn't noticed with thousands of other Garmins beeping.  I started it at that point, and then lapped it at the mile marker so I would have my real course splits from then on.  That was also the last point in the race I looked at my Garmin.

Start -- Can you find me?

The whole race was a "spot a ponytail, work to reel her in" endeavor for me, so with that strategy and the elevation variations I ran by feel.  I always seem to race better this way, but I'm always afraid to do it when I'm gunning for a certain time goal.  The race was large (5,000+), but it was still pretty thin out front so I really never ran with anyone, but there were always others in view.

If you look good in your race photos, you're not running hard enough!

There was a huge clock at the 5K, which I came through at about 18:38, feeling so much better than I had at halfway in Monday's race!  I knew ahead of time that the course would be difficult to negative split due to the elevation (chart below).  Mile 4 had a lot of decline, which I simultaneously enjoyed and worried about, because I knew we would go back up it on a road a few blocks over in mile 5!  Mile 5 was tough and I was surprised my split wasn't slower than it was, but I think it's what took a strong finish out my legs for the final mile (plus the final mile also had a lot of up!).  I'd been working on pulling a gal in front of me in, and I gave it my all to pull up on her at the end, but I ran out of real estate and she finished 2 seconds ahead of me.  Although I wished I'd have had a stronger 6th mile and moved up a place, I was still happy because I gained about 30 seconds on her in the final 2 miles.

I went pretty deep into the pain cave in the final 2 miles.  Dropping to 10K pace is challenging during marathon training, and doing so without being rested even more-so.  However, it is amazing what a difference small variables and a different day can make.  There was no difference in my fitness on September 4 vs. September 10, but there was a huge difference in my performance and how paces felt, and about a minute difference in my 10K time.  6:10ish felt like death on September 4, and 5:59ish felt maximal but do-able on September 10.  This further illustrates the need for ideal conditions for any of us to run our best, and also shows the benefits of being rested.  The Plaza course and weather were slightly better than the Run for a Child course and weather (85% humidity vs. 100%; 170 ft of gain vs. 240 ft), and I was a tad more rested for this one, but I sure can't wait to see how an actual taper feels!  This was a great check-point in my training cycle that showed my training is working; I'm so thankful I had the opportunity to find that out and I am ready to push forward to my next step.  I also still believe I have a 36:50 in me, but it's going to take 45* and a taper to find it (and perhaps also not running 3 races in 8 days!)!

Official results are here (the 5K splits are about 15 seconds fast for everyone, though).  Look at those smokin' top 4 ladies (33:57-35:15!).

"Anything is possible if a person believes." - Mark 9:23

Awards

Splits shown one way (missing first 0.4)

Splits shown another way (also missing first 0.4)

Elevation chart

It pays to be old

One thing Albani and Jon did during my 7 mile cool-down...

This trip to Kansas City also included our first trip to IKEA, a hotel pool, and fantastic family time with my sister's family!

IKEA

Cousins

Cuteness

Also in our hotel, hah

Cousin love

Labor of Love: Double Race Weekend

The Short:

2017 was my 3rd annual KLife Stars & Stripes 5K + Run for a Child 10K Labor Day weekend combo.

I pulled off an overall person win in the 5K, despite the lead bike taking me on a detour that cost me about 0:20.  I ran my first mile at about goal marathon pace (6:15) and miles 2-3 at about goal half pace (6:05 and 6:07) for a 6:08 average (official time 19:26) -- I was pleased with how controlled the paces felt during the race, but it's hard to judge much from running such a short distance at those long race paces.  Results are here.

I netted an overall female win in the 10K; my first overall win in this competitive race in my three times running it.  In the heat and humidity, 6:10 average pace did NOT feel controlled in this one (it felt HARD!), especially running the entire race solo.  I'd hoped to break into the 37s on this challenging course, but had to settle for 38:18.  It was still a course PR (and actually a road PR, although I've run about this during the final 10K of half marathons), bettering my 38:43 from this race in 2016, but I wanted more from myself.  I'll chalk it up to a good effort on tired legs and look forward to better racing weather!  Race results are here.

Action shot that I do not hate!

The Long:
These races and associated travel have become a Labor Day tradition for my family, and this was the third consecutive year we made the short treks to both (both 2016 races are described here, and Run for a Child is detailed further here).  It's a pretty easy combination, with the 5K on Saturday and the 10K on Monday.  We usually do several other family activities along with the races, including spending Sunday night in a hotel with a pool, so the child loves this tradition too!

My goals going into the races were to run the "5K" (which has ranged from 2.95 to 3.3 miles) at marathon goal pace, to beat my 2016 time in the 10K, and to net some cash at both (this was my husband's biggest goal).  I have a goal 10K next weekend, and my coach kind of nicely asked what I was thinking with scheduling 3 races in 8 days (and really, what WAS I thinking?!).  Since CIM training trumps everything, it made sense to train through all of these races, and running the 5K at goal marathon pace gave it a purpose that I was content with while saving my legs for the two 10Ks.  My coach mentioned that this first 10K would be more like a tempo run than a race also.

KLife Stars & Stripes 5K

I started off Saturday's 5K at a pace that felt about like marathon effort.  I looked at my watch less than a half mile in to see that I was averaging 6:10, so backed off a bit.  Marathon goal pace is always such an awkward pace - not fast but not slow, but always work - and right now mentally it's really weird to me because when I think about running 6:17 I think I'm going to be huffing/puffing/dying, but on this day I was not.  I passed a few men to move into first overall a bit before the mile, which I came through in 6:15.  The lead cyclist led me a bit off course around that point, and if he had not I think the course would have been exactly accurate this year (my Garmin had 3.17 with the course error; usually I get 3.08-3.11 in certified 5Ks).

I had a hard time staying at marathon goal pace, in part due to having a lead cyclist pushing me, and in part due to feeling like I was running way too easy for a 5K.  I ended up speeding up a touch and came through mile 2 in 6:05, which is about my half goal pace.  I did the same for mile 3 (6:07), and then the lead cyclist was giving me a hard time about chatting with him and told me he was going to pull off to the side and let me kick in.  So I kicked the final bit, with a Garmin reading of 5:36.  I always enjoy an overall overall win, and the race organizers of this one are very kind.

Being heckled (in a nice way) by the lead cyclist

I was encouraged by how comfortable my pace felt.  I felt that I could have sustained the pace for a half that day (my average was 6:08, and I want to average 6:06 for my next half).  The weather was great -- about 60* (not sure on humidity, it's always humid here but when it's that cool it's not bothersome) and no wind -- so that certainly helped.  I finished off my mileage for the day with a 4 mile cool-down at 6:50-7:00 pace, and felt good about that too (my warm-up was 3 miles).  After the race we played around Branson Landing and took a train ride on the Branson Scenic Railway.

Celebrating at the awards

They had free Chick-Fil-A, & I won coupons for 3 free meals & desserts

Kicking back & relaxing on our train ride

Monday's weather was not nearly as nice as Saturday's.  It was 78* with 95% humidity at race start, and based on how this weather has affected my performances this summer in training and racing, I knew I was not in for the greatest race, but everyone has to deal with it so I hoped to get out there and compete.  This race offers prize money to the top 3, and in both 2015 and 2016 I placed 3rd overall in it.  My parents surprised me and showed up at the starting line, so I was pleasantly distracted from thinking too much before the race!  My dad's video of the race start is here.

Surprise!  Best cheer crew ever (photo by my mom so she isn't in it though)!

I started with a 6:15 mile, according to plan.  This put me in 1st female position, which was a welcome surprise.  This course's elevation is challenging, with the first mile being nearly all uphill before rolling ups and downs the rest of the way, so I'd hoped to start around 6:15 and then drop to 6:00ish, but it's really one you have to pace by feel because your pace will vary throughout each mile.  Mile 2 was 6:09, and in sharp contrast to Saturday, the pace sure did not feel comfortable!  I also heard people cheering "Go Aubrey", and I could tell the second female was right on my heels.  This made me even more uncomfortable, because I hate leading in a close race and I didn't feel like I was going to be able to speed up if she challenged me.  I was also running completely alone, with the men in front of me too distant to be beneficial to me.  I kept telling myself that I needed to catch the one closest to me to be in the 37s (which turned out to be accurate), but that didn't seem to help; my body was more for trying to hang on than to speed ahead in this race (again, in contrast to Saturday).

It would be nice to run the first 1.5 miles in the opposite direction

My third mile was also 6:09, and I was becoming even more sure that I was not going to be able to speed up.  I thought about the irony that I was running almost exactly the same pace I'd done on Saturday, when I'd felt like I could run for 10 more miles at end of that 5K, but at that point on Monday I wasn't sure I was going to make it another 3 miles (my breathing was much more labored on Labor Day)!  I told myself to just lock into that pace and reminded myself that the gal behind me probably felt just as bad as I did.  I made it through miles 4-5 in 6:08 and 6:13, but it was tough!  I dumped water on myself at 3 aid stations, which seems pretty excessive for a 10K, but I just wanted something to cool me off (not sure it actually helped).  I even turned and looked at how much lead I had on turns around mile 4 and 5.5, because I was not sure I could hold off any advances by #2.  She was not far back at mile 4 (probably the only reason I did not run mile 4 in 6:30!), but at 5.5 I knew I had the win and was able to breathe a sigh of relief.  The final mile has a lot more downhill than up, and going into the race I thought I'd be able to hit a 5:45 on that mile (nope -- about 20 seconds slower!).  I was able to close at 5:23 for the final 0.22, mainly because I just wanted it to be over.

My dad's video of my finish is here, and one of the awards ceremony here.

Despite my disappointment about how hard this effort felt, I enjoyed the overall female win, with a time of 38:18.  The second female ended up running 38:53.  I ran 38:43 in this race last year, and I thought I would be able to run at least 10 seconds/mile faster than that this year, but I did not have that!  It's hot and humid every year at this race, but since we've had such nice morning temperatures recently, I felt like this year I wasn't as adapted for it.  I also seem to be more affected by this weather than I used to be for some reason - or at least I notice and complain about it more!  Last year I spent much of the race chasing down the female who ultimately placed 4th, while this year I was in no man's land the whole race.  Last year I had a fantastic day and this year was average.  Final excuse, last year I had a little rest for this race, and this year I was coming off a 62 mile week (I also ran 14 miles total on race day).  My coach said this would be more of a tempo than a race, but my tempo range is 5:57-6:10 so it was barely that!  I guess I am just trying to rationalize why I didn't run faster than I did, because I thought I could get into the 37s.  This is my second best 10K ever and best road 10K...just quite a far cry off my track PR of 37:09, and mainly a testament that I don't run many goal 10Ks.  I didn't expect to rival my track PR that I ran at 45* in a deep field, even though I think I'm in a little better shape right now; I would not tell anyone to go for a PR on this race's course.  My coach reminded me that we separate road and track PRs for a reason; I just think I have a much faster road 10K in me than this!

I was NOT encouraged by how uncomfortable my pace felt.  What a difference a different day makes, eh?!  6:10 pace did not feel maintainable, and I certainly could not have run a half at that pace on this day (I barely made it a 10K!)!  But I'm working on being thankful for the win and moving on! Admittedly it is shaking my confidence for my next races...and how can I even think about 26.2 at 6:17 pace when all I had for 6.2 was 6:10?!

My expression here is hilarious

I love an oversize check!

Dr. Bob is a local running legend & this was his birthday!

After the race, we went to Crystal Bridges in Bentonville, which is something I've wanted to do every year after this race but have usually been too tired to handle!  My friend Mary and her daughter Ro joined Jon, Albani, my parents, and me.

Crystal Bridges

My sweet husband with the girls

Best mom and grandma

Crystal Bridges cuteness

At the end of the day, I feel extremely grateful and blessed with this weekend for many reasons.  I treasure the family and running memories, and the step in the journey.  Nothing is always easy or perfect in this world, but it's exactly where God wants us to be, and we can give glory to Him for the comfortable and the uncomfortable!  Clearly 6:10 pace falls into both categories for me!

Winnings

Professional photo (late addition)