What I Read in 2019

These were my reads for the year!  Yes, I know I need to get a Goodreads account.

Bold titles = a favorite that I recommend.  I was really stingy with these recommendations, or else I'd have bolded 75% of these books!

1. Once Upon a Time There Was You by Elizabeth Berg
2. The Life We Bury by Allen Eskens
3. The Best of Adam Sharp by Graeme Simsion
4. You Will Know Me by Megan Abbott
5. The Man of My Dreams by Curtis Sittenfeld
   
6. Time Keeper by Mitch Albom
7. Fitness Junkie by Lucy Sykes & Jo Piazza
8. Clay Girl by Heather Tucker
9. A Child Called "It" by Dave Pelzer
10. The Reason You're Alive by Matthew Quick
11. Far From the Tree by Robin Benway
12. The Lost Boy by Dave Pelzer
13. Something Like Happy by Eva Woods
14. A Man Named Dave by Dave Pelzer
15. Christmas in Paris by Hazel Gaynor and Heather Webb
16. Winter Street by Elin Hilderbrand
17. Where'd You Go, Bernadette? by Maria Semple
18. Three Things About Elise by Joanna Cannon
19. The Stranger in the Woods by Michael Finkel
20. Surprise Me by Sophie Kinsella 
21. The Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold
22. After Anna by Lisa Scottoline
23. Winter Stroll by Elin Hilderbrand
24. Winter Storms by Elin Hilderbrand
25. Winter Solstice by Elin Hilderbrand
26. Look Alive Out There by Sloane Crosley
27. Feared by Lisa Scottoline
28. Joy School by Elizabeth Berg
29. I See Life Through Rosé-Colored Glasses by Lisa Scottoline & Francesca Serritella 
30. My Grandmother Asked Me To Tell You She's Sorry by Fredrik Backman
31. Lost Cat: A True Story of Love, Desperation, & GPS Technology by Caroline Paul
32. Beautiful Day by Elin Hilderbrand
33. Talk Before Sleep by Elizabeth Berg
34. I Might Regret This:  Essays, Drawings, Vulnerabilities, and Other Stuff by Abbi Jacobson
35. The Gifts of Imperfection by Brene Brown
36. Almost Sisters by Joshilyn Jackson
37. South Pole Station by Ashley Shelby
38. There are No Grown-Ups by Pamela Druckerman
39. Us Against You by Fredrick Backman
40. The Next Person You Meet in Heaven by Mitch Albom
41. My Sister's Keeper by Jodi Picoult
42. The Fever by Megan Abbott
43. An Unacceptable Death by Barbara Seranella
44. Small Great Things by Jodi Picoult
45. The First Phone Call From Heaven by Mitch Albom
46. The Road Home by Richard Paul Evans (this is the final book in the Broken Road series I recommend reading the trilogy in order - I read the other two in 2018 but this one wasn't released until spring 2019)
47. Big Little Lies by Liane Moriarty
48. Okay Fine Whatever by Courtenay Hameister
49. Leaving Time by Jodi Picoult
50. Barefoot by Elin Hilderbrand
51. All the Wrong Places by Joy Fielding
52. A Walk in the Woods: Rediscovering America on the Appalachian Trail by Bill Bryson
53. Between the Lines by Jodi Picoult and Samantha Van Leer
54. The Magic Strings of Frankie Presto by Mitch Albom
55. Someone Else's Love Story by Joshilyn Jackson
56. Beyond the Point by Claire Gibson
57. This Could Change Everything by Jill Mansell
58. The Library of Lost and Found by Phaedra Patrick
59. Commonwealth by Ann Patchett
60. Now That You Mention It by Kristan Higgins 
61. Good Luck With That by Kristan Higgins
62.  As Bright as Heaven by Susan Meissner
63. Run by Ann Patchett
64. Meet Me at Beachcomber Bay by Jill Mansell
65. 26 Marathons by Meb Keflezighi
66. Gods in Alabama by Joshilyn Jackson 
67. The Daddy Diaries by Joshua Braff
68. Let Your Mind Run by Deena Kastor 
69. Sisterland by Curtis Sittenfeld
70. Meb for Mortals by Meb Keflezighi
71. The Joy Project by Tony Reinke
72. Night by Elie Wiesel
73. Lottery by Patricia Wood
74. The Girl on the Train by Paula Hawkins
75. What Made Maddy Run by Kate Fagan
76. Into the Water by Paula Hawkins
77. Summer of '69 by Elin Hilderbrand
78. George by Alex Gino
79. Run to Overcome by Meb Keflezighi
80. Running Home: A Memoir by Katie Arnold 
81. Never Have I Ever by Joshilyn Jackson 
82. Reconstructing Amelia by Kimberly McCreight
83. The Christian Atheist by Craig Groeschel
84. All You Can Ever Know by Nicole Chung
85. This is the Story of a Happy Marriage by Ann Patchett
86. Roar by Stacey Sims
87. Mercy by Jodi Picoult
88. How Bad Do You Want It? by Matt Fitzgerald
89. Strong by Kara Goucher
90. The Happy Runner by David Roche and Megan Roche
91. Double Cross by Jackson Pearce 
92. Counterfeit Gods by Timothy Keller
93.  Riven by Jerry B. Jenkins - top book of 2019!
    
94. The Handmaid's Tale by Margaret Atwood 
95. How to Fall in Love with Anyone by Mandy Len Catron
96. Even If I Fall by Abigail Johnson
97. Right Beside You by Mary Monroe
98. French Twist by James Patterson
99. All the Dirty Parts by Daniel Handler
100. The Ocean at the End of the Lane by Neil Gaiman
101. The Grip of It by Jac Jemc
102. The Mother-in-Law by Sally Hepworth 
103. Mercy Me by Margaret A. Graham 
104. The Seven or Eight Deaths of Stella Fortuna by Juliet Grames
105. Does This Beach Make Me Look Fat? by Lisa Scottoline and Francesca Serritella

I didn't set a goal of reading a certain number of books, but in November when I realized I was getting close, I decided I wanted to hit or exceed 100!

The Happy Runner

Just a few days after I wrote about how the passion is in the process, I began reading "The Happy Runner" by David & Megan Roche, on the ride to the Indianapolis Monumental Marathon.

I highly recommend this one!  I'm going to be brief and vague, but most of the information in it really lined up with how I think about my running when I'm the happiest with it.  Results are sure great, and there is nothing wrong with having big goals, but if you don't love the process, then in my opinion you're really missing out.  I also think that runners who are the most successful generally love it, because loving it makes us more consistent - and nothing helps your running more than consistent mileage day after day.

The book also has some great training tips, and although not really anything I hadn't read before, it would be very valuable to a newer runner.

So read this and be happier!  :-)  If you're like me, happier at any given fitness level also equals the fastest I can be at that fitness level.

Christmas Cheer Compression

I own an embarrassingly large amount of compression socks, including 4 Christmas pairs that I wanted to get plenty of use out of this month...

These say "Sock it to me, Santa"

Reindeer games

We met at the Brewski Barn to run by El Dorado
Lake, so a photo with the sign was a must

Setting the camera timer & sprinting to climb
up on this sign via the rock on the side was no
easy task!

Festive headbands really completed this one

Reindeer socks on snow

Christmas morning

My niece's unicorn socks on Christmas topped
them all, though!

I also love ugly Christmas sweaters - after Christmas lights run #1

After Christmas lights run #2 - please note
our red & green Noxgear vests too!

Not compression, but my other festive socks

100 miles

For the second and third times, I ran 100+ miles within a 7 day span.  Since these rolling 7s overlap, I'm only counting it as once, but from Dec. 5-11 I ran 100 miles exactly (unbeknownst to me until I pulled up my Strava training log when I started this blog post), and from Dec. 7-13 I ran 100.8 miles (discovered after uploading my second run on Dec. 13).  I guess running an 100 mile week is less intimidating when you don't actually know you're doing it!

Miles with friends are always better!

On Dec. 2 and 3, I was in a taper for the California International Marathon, but when everything changed, I didn't open my training schedule again that week.  I ran whatever I wanted each day, which ended up being a lot since running is my coping mechanism and because I wanted to do tribute runs for my brother for Psalms 24 and 139, 24 and 13.9 milers.  I guess I am thankful I didn't have time to double most days, or I would have probably pushed the envelope too much.

I started back on a training schedule on Dec. 9 (I think we can all agree I need a plan to save me from myself!), and I followed it exactly except I moved a double from Dec. 15 to Dec. 13 due to the weather.  It was 54 degrees and sunny the afternoon of Friday, Dec. 13, and on Sunday, Dec. 15 we were supposed to have an ice storm (which did happen).  Here is what I ran Dec. 5-14 (149 miles in 10 days).  I was at my parent's house/off work Dec. 5-9.

Dec. 5:
AM: 13.9 easy Miles for Mark for Psalm 139 with April on the Red Bud Trail.  This was the first time following Mark's death that I was around someone who wasn't in the middle of it all, and talking with her helped tremendously.
PM: 4.2 easy miles, because we finished all preparations and it was 70 degrees out on Dec. 5.
Extras: 35 minutes glute yoga

Dec. 6:
AM:  8.1 miles with an unstructured fartlek in the final few miles (mostly 2 telephone poles on/2 off just to get my heart pumping and to breathe in the cold air).
Extras:  30 minutes body weight strength and 30 minutes post-run yoga

Dec. 7:
AM:  24 easy Miles for Mark for Psalm 24.  I started this run from my parent's house with my friend Michelle, who came to town for my brother's funeral and stayed the night in order to run most of this with me (isn't she the best?!).  We picked up April around mile 5, and she did 10 miles with us.  I dropped Michelle off at mile 18, and completed the final 6 miles by myself, including running by my brother's grave.  Most of the run was on dirt roads and the pace was a little slower than I usually run, so it wasn't very hard on my body and it was really good for my spirit.

Dec. 8:
AM:  7.1 easy miles. I couldn't decide whether I wanted to run 6 miles or 8 miles, so I ran 7!
PM:  6.2 easy miles with April. I was planning to do 5 miles but she told me if we did 6 we could run by a creepy house and it was definitely worth it!  The owner did not want the rails-to-trails Red Bud Trail behind his property, and put up all kinds of threatening signs plus an owl hanging from a noose in his backyard.  We wanted to take photos but we heard a door open so we didn't stop running.
Extras: 35 minutes yoga for tight hamstrings

Dec. 9:
AM:  7.3 easy miles in 25-35 mph wind, gusting to 45 mph.  Kansas is much flatter than Missouri but is generally also much windier!
PM:  5 easy miles that I stopped to do on my drive home to Missouri before it started sleeting.

Dec. 10:
AM:  10.9 miles with 3 warm up, 8 x 0.5 with 2:00 recovery jogs, 2.1 cool down in 2:53, 2:54, 2:54, 2:55, 2:51, 2:51, 2:53, 2:50.  My goal was to start at tempo pace (5:55ish or 2:57ish) and work down to 5K pace (sub-5:40 or sub-2:50).  I started a little quick and couldn't get under 5:40 (I am sure those two things are related!), but after the week I'd had I was pretty shocked I could even run sub-7:00 pace, let alone sub-6:00.
PM:  4.2 easy at lunch, which was needed on my first day back at work.

Dec. 11:
AM:  9.1 easy miles with my running group.
Extras:  45 minutes strength workout and stretching in the YMCA steam room

Dec. 12:
AM:  8.3 easy miles with Rebecca and Missy, with 8 x 15 second hill sprints towards the end.
PM:  5.1 easy miles at lunch
Extras: 15 minutes hip-opening yoga

Dec. 13:
AM:  8.2 easy
PM:  5.1 easy at lunch in gorgeous weather.
Extras:  15 minutes core work

Dec. 14:
AM:  21 with 3 progressive fast finish.  I couldn't get my fast finish miles down to my goal pace of 6:40, 6:20, 6:00 - I managed a progression but only to 6:38, 6:36, 6:26.  I felt strong but not fast.  After writing this post, I know exactly why!  The same thing happened on a 24 miler at the end of my first ever 100 mile week; I felt strong but not fast.  As much as I want 100 mile weeks to be my sweet spot, my body seems to be telling me they should only be used sparingly at this point.
Extras:  30 minutes post-run yoga

I wrote about my first ever 100 mile week here, and a 96 mile week here.

I am crazy enough to run 100 mile weeks and 20+ milers without training for anything, but currently I may or may not be training for something.  I change my mind often.  Initially after losing my brother and missing CIM, I said I was done with OTQ-chasing and that 2:46:08 could just be my marathon PR forever.  At the urging of my husband and dad, and because I know myself well enough that I know I need a structured running schedule, I asked my coach to train me as if I am going to run Houston on 1/19/20, the last day you can net an OTQ for the 2020 Trials.  In December I have generally felt physically very strong, but I have been completely exhausted emotionally and mentally.  On Dec. 9 when I started back with structured training, I felt there was no way I'd have it in me to run Houston, but since then here and there I have moments of "I'm going to do it", and everyone tells me that Mark would want me to do it if I feel up for it, which I believe is accurate.

So, I might run Houston.  I might not.  My coach said I don't need to decide until the week of.  My marathon PR might stay 2:46 forever, but more likely I will chase a sub-2:45 at some point in the future (at Houston or after).  I trust that God will give me the wisdom to decide when the time is right!

100 miles in the winter yields a lot of laundry

Everything else is trivial

On December 3, everything changed.  While my top priorities are always my faith and family, I am very guilty of getting caught up in the day-to-day.  Little worries like errands that need run, saying the right things at the right times, hitting certain split times on runs, chores that need completed, remembering my to-do list, wondering if I'm eating the right thing or recovering in the best way, etc. get pulled to the forefront.  After my brother was killed in a car accident, all of those things seemed so insignificant.

God gave us a gorgeous sunset tribute

Mark's funeral service was a beautiful tribute to Jesus.  Mark loved God and had read the full Bible multiple times.  He was a member of the church where his funeral was held, where my parents are also members.  Songs included were Amazing Grace, What a Friend We Have in Jesus, and I Can Only Imagine (this one played during a slideshow of photos from Mark's life).  Bible readings were from Isaiah 43:1-3 and John 10:27-30, and their pastor provided a beautiful sermon about how God has us in His hand based on the passage from John.

God gave us a stunning sunset for the graveside service.  Family and friends came from near and far, and many more sent flowers, kind words, and tributes.  My family felt so loved, even in this time of extreme grief.  It goes without saying that this was completely devastating for my parents.  I was fortunate my job was extremely understanding and I was able to leave work as soon as I got the news and stay with my parents a state away for a week.

I decided to honor Mark in the best way I knew how, by running for him.  His favorite Bible passages were Psalms 24 and 139, so on December 5 I ran 13.9 miles for him and on December 7 I ran 24 miles for him.  I had company from wonderful running friends for most of those miles, running only the final 6 of the 24 solo.

Dec. 5 - 13.9 miles with April

The longest duration on feet I've
had for years!

Dec. 7 - 24 miles for me, with Michelle for the first 18 &
April for 10 in the middle (I have no idea what is wrong with
my jacket here but I do NOT have a pregnancy announcement
coming, hah)

Many runners reached out and told me that they were sorry about Mark, and although it probably seemed insignificant, they were also sorry that I missed CIM.  It meant a lot to me that people acknowledged that disappointment, but more than anything I was upset that the world went on as usual after Mark was gone.  I wasn't upset that I couldn't run CIM, I was mad they were still having the race.  I was upset that people were still running races, going to work, going shopping, eating at restaurants, doing all of the every day things that we all do as if the world hadn't changed, when in fact it had changed so drastically.  Of course everything goes on, but when it's your family member who has passed, it can almost feel insulting; how can everything go on as if everything is the same?

Fortunately my family has our faith.  We know Mark is in heaven and that he is rejoicing with Jesus. We know we will all be there some day.  I've been floored by the helpfulness and generosity of family and friends.  I've been overwhelmed by the sheer number of people praying for us, near and far.  Really everything on this earth is trivial when you really stop and think about it, but love and family are pretty special.

Mark's obituary is online here.