Everything else is trivial

On December 3, everything changed.  While my top priorities are always my faith and family, I am very guilty of getting caught up in the day-to-day.  Little worries like errands that need run, saying the right things at the right times, hitting certain split times on runs, chores that need completed, remembering my to-do list, wondering if I'm eating the right thing or recovering in the best way, etc. get pulled to the forefront.  After my brother was killed in a car accident, all of those things seemed so insignificant.

God gave us a gorgeous sunset tribute

Mark's funeral service was a beautiful tribute to Jesus.  Mark loved God and had read the full Bible multiple times.  He was a member of the church where his funeral was held, where my parents are also members.  Songs included were Amazing Grace, What a Friend We Have in Jesus, and I Can Only Imagine (this one played during a slideshow of photos from Mark's life).  Bible readings were from Isaiah 43:1-3 and John 10:27-30, and their pastor provided a beautiful sermon about how God has us in His hand based on the passage from John.

God gave us a stunning sunset for the graveside service.  Family and friends came from near and far, and many more sent flowers, kind words, and tributes.  My family felt so loved, even in this time of extreme grief.  It goes without saying that this was completely devastating for my parents.  I was fortunate my job was extremely understanding and I was able to leave work as soon as I got the news and stay with my parents a state away for a week.

I decided to honor Mark in the best way I knew how, by running for him.  His favorite Bible passages were Psalms 24 and 139, so on December 5 I ran 13.9 miles for him and on December 7 I ran 24 miles for him.  I had company from wonderful running friends for most of those miles, running only the final 6 of the 24 solo.

Dec. 5 - 13.9 miles with April

The longest duration on feet I've
had for years!

Dec. 7 - 24 miles for me, with Michelle for the first 18 &
April for 10 in the middle (I have no idea what is wrong with
my jacket here but I do NOT have a pregnancy announcement
coming, hah)

Many runners reached out and told me that they were sorry about Mark, and although it probably seemed insignificant, they were also sorry that I missed CIM.  It meant a lot to me that people acknowledged that disappointment, but more than anything I was upset that the world went on as usual after Mark was gone.  I wasn't upset that I couldn't run CIM, I was mad they were still having the race.  I was upset that people were still running races, going to work, going shopping, eating at restaurants, doing all of the every day things that we all do as if the world hadn't changed, when in fact it had changed so drastically.  Of course everything goes on, but when it's your family member who has passed, it can almost feel insulting; how can everything go on as if everything is the same?

Fortunately my family has our faith.  We know Mark is in heaven and that he is rejoicing with Jesus. We know we will all be there some day.  I've been floored by the helpfulness and generosity of family and friends.  I've been overwhelmed by the sheer number of people praying for us, near and far.  Really everything on this earth is trivial when you really stop and think about it, but love and family are pretty special.

Mark's obituary is online here.