The "U" Words

Upset, unhappy, unwell, unsettled, uncomfortable, uncertain, unsure.

There are many words that begin with U that describe how I feel about my current injury.  In general, I don't think runners deal well with not running (I sure don't!), and forced time off is far worse than a planned recovery period.  I struggle with not having a definitive timeline for my return to running.  I will start back when my peroneal muscle is healed, however soon or later that occurs.

My mom has an app that finds photos that go with
specific verses, & it is on point!

Initially, at Indy I was sure the injury was season ending.  However, in the 3-4 days right after race, I had dramatic improvements each day, progressing from being unable to walk without holding onto something/someone to being able to walk normally with only slight tightness.  Prior to Indy, my calf bothered me just as much while walking as it did while running, so once I could walk normally I was quite hopeful.  I also had it looked at twice that week, along with Graston and ART treatments, and my chiropractor (who is also my coach) said it was much better on Thursday 10/4 than it had been on Monday 10/1.

I made an appointment to run on the AlterG treadmill on Monday 10/8, sure that I would be able to run on it at a reduced percentage of body weight.  I thought I'd possibly run on it all week, or maybe even alternate runs outside with runs on the AlterG.  I calculated how far I could run during my appointment and even took an hour of vacation from work so I could go in late, since the AlterG isn't open until 6:30 a.m.  I knew I was hard up when I was super excited to run on a treadmill!

When I began running on the AlterG, I had a very abrupt rude awakening.  It was extremely painful.  I adjusted the body weight down farther and farther, hoping for relief, but it hurt just as much at 10% as it had at 80%.  I thought maybe it would loosen up so tried to run for a bit, but pulled the plug at 1 mile.

That was when I truly knew my season was over.

I know I still have time before CIM, and I could probably still run it; but I was never going just to finish another marathon.  I can't miss as much training as I'm going to need to and have a chance to PR, so it is better for me to take all of the time I need to heal and to then select a different marathon based on when I'm able to resume training.  That is also probably smarter long-term, marathon time goals aside, because I'll truly be able to get this muscle back to 100% without rushing back into training.  I want to run a 2:45 badly, but I want to run for the rest of my life a million times more.

There have certainly been tears and stages of grief, and I sure don't deal with work and life stress as well when I'm not running!  But I've learned lessons from this already, and I don't regret the training that I put in one bit.  I loved the day-to-day process, and I would train even if I never raced.  I did things in training I never thought I could do.

I did most things right.  I followed my training schedule well, I ran consistent mileage week after week - you're more likely to get injured when you're inconsistent with your mileage or increasing mileage, and I didn't do either - I mostly sat at similar mileage week after week.  I stretched and foam rolled daily, often twice.  I strength trained twice a week.  I ate nutrient-dense foods and took care of my body the best I could.

My best wasn't enough, and I realize that I made some mistakes (more about that here).  In particular, I need to be more careful about running when I'm sick, and I need to listen to my gut instinct about taking days off.  If I truly don't want to run for a few days in a row or get nervous about runs that should be insignificant, that is a major indicator that I need to back off before an injury occurs or worsens.  I also need to work on sleeping more, but I have a very difficult time falling asleep and staying asleep, which oddly enough gets worse the more active I am (I also don't want to take sleep meds, although I use Melatonin a few times a month).

Perhaps I should not have run the mileage I was running, but I don't regret taking that risk either.  I'm not going to OTQ without running higher mileage than I've done before.  I felt so strong during my build, and I felt like I was handling the mileage extremely well, until suddenly one muscle wasn't.  I am still proud I ran what I did; for 8 weeks (July 30 to September 3) I averaged 78.3 miles per week.  This paid off with a big 10K PR and will help me in my next marathon build.

I'm not sure what's next, but I'll select another marathon once I'm back on the road.  I am sad that CIM 2018 isn't in the cards, because I truly thought it was my best chance for the 2:45, but I suppose CIM will be there in 2019 too!

"The one who calls you is faithful, and he will do it." - 1 Thessalonians 5:24

I am trying to think of positive U words, which is a little harder...  Uplift,  unconditional, ultimate, unstoppable... (although maybe unfit - as in, lost fitness - too!).