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| I made this face for most of the year |
2020 - 2194
2019 - 3854
2018 - 3047
2017 - 3043
2016 - 2294
2015 - 1942
2014 - 972
2013 - 595
2012 - 1373
2011 - 1539
2010 - 2106
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| I made this face for most of the year |
I've heard comparisons between running and abusive relationships, such as "when it's good, it's so good, but when it's bad it's terribly painful and heartbreaking." The highs are so high we keep chasing them regardless of how low the lows.
The marathon and I have mostly a great relationship. The majority of my 30-some marathons have been amazing experiences and I've been able to run about the times my fitness indicated, or when I was way off it's been glaringly obvious why (bronchitis, or when I ran 5 marathons and 4 halves in 3-4 months). From late 2017 to early 2020, I wanted more than the marathon was willing to give, but I kept coming close enough that I was convinced it would give it to me the next time. I could never squeeze out those last 68 seconds, but I still knew that on a less windy day or a slightly faster course, I could find myself at the relationship finish line under the time cut off.
2020 happened, and due to my wonky-shaped bones I missed the November marathon I'd trained for. Fortunately I only had to take 2.5 weeks off, during which I got an expedited PhD in hip impingement, and returned extremely hungry for every day runs and mileage. What I didn't return hungry for was a re-do of the missed marathon or even a spring marathon.
Those who know me know I am always marathon training. Marathon training or unable to run, there is nothing else. I have just loved the marathon so much for so long, really since my second marathon in 2004 (the first one I really raced, and with a negative split). That's not to say that we haven't had plenty of ups and downs between then and now, including a nearly 4-year hiatus during which I thought I was done with competitive running (2011 to mid-2014), but through it all I still loved my 26.2s. And I still do, but I guess this fall situation made me realize that I'm also mad at the marathon for not giving me quite enough! I mean, I gave it everything I had and it just couldn't give me that last bit of time I worked so hard for, and then this year it had the audacity to give me a DNS.
Do I hope to PR-chase again? Do I still have a bone to pick with 2:45:00 (regardless of what the 2024 standard is)? Yes. But I also accept that my PR may always be 2:46:08, which is still something for someone who for most of her marathoning career never even dreamed of seeing a finishing clock starting with a 2, and then fully believed that her absolute limit was 2:59:59. All times and paces aside, I've found great joy in the marathoning journey, and that alone makes me confident that I'll be on it again.
So really, I'm kind of everything at once at the marathon. In love with, mad at, thankful for, curious about, appreciative of, uncertain about, and plenty more adjectives that escape me at the moment.
I'm not planning to run a spring 2021 marathon*, and I am currently able to run (a solid amount at that)! I'm not even sure who I am anymore. ;-)
While I've had my share of being mad at races, at workouts, at injuries, at the weather, at my body, etc., I don't think I've ever been mad at running. Running nearly every day is my big dream goal and anything else I can do is bonus!
*I fully reserve the right to change this decision at any time.
| Single leg balance! |
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| Traction |
| When you are so in sync with your training buddy that you have pains that require cross training on the same days... |
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| Pincer type is on the far left |
| We called this #seewhathappensseptember |
Since I don't expect to have many/any race recaps this season (thanks, COVID-19), I thought I'd recap some of the time trials I do. Next time I'll have a better name - my running group may do a "Pick Your Poison" track time trial in September.
My coach put a 5k time trial on my training schedule for August 21. I think she mainly wanted to see where I was at and get my max heart rate. I knew I wasn't in top shape so it didn't feel like a big deal, but at the same time I treated it like an actual race. Even though I wasn't in PR form, I still wanted to get the best out of myself that morning. I drank Generation Ucan and caffeinated nuun when I woke up, and also sipped on more nuun between my warm up and the time trial. I wore an old pair of racing shoes, changing shoes after my warm up which always helps with the mental "I'm going to run fast" piece.
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| When you wear 3 different pairs of shoes during the course of a run, you mean business |
I'd run a 2 mile time trial one week before in 12:13. I hadn't felt the best that day, and ended up having mixed feelings about the result - it would have been a good time for me 5 years ago but was slower than my PR half marathon pace from 2019. I mostly looked at it as information, plus after 15.5 weeks off from February through May I'm thankful to run any pace. For some reason, I just knew I was going to have a better day for the 5k time trial, so I decided I'd try to run it at the same pace, or about 6:06, hoping to sneak in under 19 minutes. It was 58 degrees, which I also knew would help immensely (it was 72 with 100% humidity for the 2 mile).
Three friends (Casey, Rebecca, and Missy) decided to run the time trial with me, which made it exponentially more fun! We warmed up together, and Missy and Rebecca said they planned to run the 5k, while Casey was undecided. She ended up deciding she'd do about 2 miles, and try to stick with me (if you know Casey, you know that means be a step ahead of me!). And, we were off!
Casey and I settled in side by side, at a clip that felt fast but reasonable, with Missy and Rebecca right on our heels. I looked at my watch once early to see 6:03 average, which was about what I wanted. I focused on working with Casey, and we went through the mile in 5:54. Her watch beeped a little before mine for a 5:50 first mile, and she stopped at that point. I was expecting her to run through at least 2 miles, and kind of thought she'd end up running the whole 5k with me then probably out-kicking me, so that threw me momentarily since running with her had helped so much. I could hear Missy fairly close behind, though, so that helped me keep pushing, although I did let up a little during mile 2 for a 6:02. Casey jumped back in with me for a bit during the final mile (we were on a 0.8 mile loop course), which helped tremendously. I was determined I was going to get my pace back under 6:00 for the final mile, and I did that with another 5:54 and a final 0.13 kick at 5:36 pace. I stopped my watch a little late, at 3.13, but I figure most road courses with turns read a little long anyway. My time for the 3.13 was 18:35, with an average pace of 5:56. The activity is on Strava here.
I was really happy with this one! I thought 6:05 pace would be a fantastic day right now, so exceeding that was exciting, but also I just felt so good while I was doing it. The cooler weather was a huge factor, but I'm getting stronger again and it's a great feeling. In mid-June my heart rate was 170 (it averaged 168 for this 5k) running 7:45 pace - I am not exaggerating! I started some workouts with Christian in July but typically felt like I was just hanging onto her. The way I felt during this run was how I want to feel!
| How Rebecca felt after the time trial (Casey and I walking in the distance as I recovered for the 400s) |
After the 5k I had a full recovery then 5 x 400 m. Unsurprisingly no one else wanted to do the 400s. My splits were all over the place - 1:23-1:32 - but I got them done. My legs were heavy but also I didn't have the mental energy to run anything else hard. Afterward I texted my coach that the 5k went well, the 400s not so much! She said that was how it was supposed to be. :-)
The Missouri state road racing record for my age (39) is 18:33, so now I want to find a certified 5k race in the state that is actually happening before my birthday on October 26 - which so far hasn't been a fruitful search. There are a lot of small 5ks, but very few are certified. I do appreciate the irony that I am actually seeking out a 5k - I am not 5k runner, but I really enjoyed this time trial!